Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Before the Parade Passes by

Earlier this evening, my best friend was in a standup comedy competition. We did improv together for all four years of high school so I feel comfortable making the assertion that she's one of the funniest girls in Maryland, if not the country. Granted, I may be a little biased but she really is hysterical.
Watching her video tonight made me miss her more than I already do. It also made me realize how different we've both become. We've only been apart for a few months and we still talk every day but we have these totally new lives that neither one is a part of.
Nicole is growing up so much. I see it in her standup videos. I hear it when we talk on the phone. I notice it in her texts. She was always wonderful but now it's something more, something different.
I'm so proud of Nicole and I love watching her grow up but we used to grow together; now, I feel like I'm missing out.
It's especially apparent with Nicole but it feels that way with a lot of my other friends too. They seem to have new identities. They're all finding themselves and pursuing their interests and I sit here in my room wondering how I should address my roommate's clever avoidance of cleaning.
Of course I have interests and I'm learning a lot about myself being so far from home but I'm not enjoying the same success as everyone else. I need a goal again. I need to drive again. I wanna feel my heart coming alive again.
So here it is internet, y'all are officially holding me to this: I am going to pursue those things that I put on the back burner for whatever reason. Starting with open mic night. I solemnly promise to you internet that I will sign up for open mic night and do something whether it be reading a poem, or doing standup, or singing, despite my intense fear of singing for a crowd. I just don't want the parade to pass me by.

Sincerely,
Mare

Monday, November 18, 2013

Guided Assignment 7

In this assignment, I'm meant to respond to the book "Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women." For those of you who haven't read it, I highly recommend it.
The clever thing the authors of this book do is give examples of women and girls they have met who were in oppressive situations but by being educated or rescued from brothels or financially supported, they have been able to overcome their circumstances.
One that particularly stood out to me was the story of Dai Manju. Manju was 13 when she met the authors, Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn, in a rural mountain region of China. She had been asked to drop out of elementary school by her parents in the sixth grade because they could not afford the $13 a year tuition. She was at the top of her class though and she loved learning. She wanted to be the first member of her family to graduate elementary school. 
Kristof and WuDunn wrote an article about her for the New York Times which sparked a generous man to donate $10,000 for her tuition. The money allowed the school to be renovated and for scholarships to be available for girls who couldn't afford school, including Manju.
With the scholarship, Manju made it all the way to accounting school, the equivalent of college. She graduated and found a job in a factory and was able to send more and more money home to her parents. After a few years there, she was able to find jobs for family and friends in the factory. Now, her family is one of the richest in her village. 
Dai Manju's story is remarkable to me. She grew up impoverished with little hope of continuing her education. However, because one man invested in her future, she was able to receive an education that allowed her to get a job and support her family.
It is incredible to me how much an education can do for someone.
This story also makes me realize how lucky I am. My parents had little to no trouble putting me through 12 years of catholic school, elementary and high school. Now I'm at college and I earned a sizable scholarship but my parents still don't have an issue paying the difference. I never had to worry about buying pencils or paper. I never had to wonder if I would be able to continue my education to the next year. 
I have taken all of this for granted. I always work my hardest and take the harder classes but it was all in the interest of making my future self as successful as possible. I never thought about supporting my parents (and probably my sister because you can only live comfortably on a waitressing income for so long). I also never realized how much good for others my education could do. I'm fortunate enough to be able to make it through university. I can advocate for those women who can't. Any good I do could encourage someone to invest in other women all over the world so that they can end the cycle of poverty and oppression.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Guided Assignment 6

Our assignment for this post is to discuss the words feminine and masculine and what they make us think of.
Maybe I'm crazy but those two words take me back to the four years of Latin I took in high school. Every word was either masculine, feminine or neuter and you could tell by the way it was declined. For the third declension though, there was no distinction between masculine and feminine; their personal endings were the same.
This was always interesting to me because in English, words don't have a gender. There is no division between what is masculine and feminine. And for some reason, a few third declension nouns in Latin get to enjoy that freedom.
Freedom. Now that's an interesting word. Why am I using freedom to describe something that isn't defined by gender? It's because that's not a freedom many of use get to enjoy these days.
So much of who we are and what we're allowed to do stem from our gender.
For a better part of American history, women were not allowed to do most of things men could do including vote or own property. It took years of protesting and law making to get women where they are today and even then they are not equal to men. They are still paid less than men and continue to be thought of as "the angle in the house," or "domestic goddess."
However, being a man is not much easier. Men not only discriminate against women but also against other men. It took a majority of American history for black men to even be allowed the right to vote. Now Latino and Hispanic men are at the bottom of the food chain, dominating the menial, labor intensive jobs because there is such a stigma against them.
That's not even the worst part though. I find it even more offensive when people use the adjectival forms of gender to discriminate. For example, when a boy is made fun of and ridiculed because he is "feminine," that's awful to me. The word feminine exemplifies all the best qualities of women: compassion, empathy, intelligence, and perseverance. To use that as an insult because the person being called feminine isn't a woman, is horrific. Just because a man is feminine doesn't mean he deserves to be treated with any less respect than a man who "properly" embodies his gender role by being strong and unemotional.
Gender roles are something that this country has always struggled with. During the 60s there was a lot of sexual exploration and gender roles definitely changed but it today, it still feels like women are inferior. We were only just allowed to participate in all forms of combat at the beginning of this year which still baffles me. If someone is willing to join the military to fight for their country they should be allowed to do just that, regardless of gender.
I think that it's important to realize how far women have come but also note that our journey isn't over. Equality for all people of any gender, race or socioeconomic class should be a goal for this country to strive for.

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Here I am, Lord?

This morning, my friend and I took a trip to Austin High School to attend an Austin Stone service. For those of you who have never heard of it, here are some statements from their about page:
"We love Jesus, God’s Word, and each other. We're taking Jesus' revolutionary message of grace, truth, and compassion to Austin and to the world."
"The Austin Stone is a Church for the City. We're much more than a church to attend, but a community centered on the person and mission of Jesus Christ. We're actively working to build a great Austin, renewed and redeemed by the gospel. "
Does it sound like a cult to you? Because that's kind of what it felt like. I mean I didn't feel like I was being brainwashed or anything I just felt highly uncomfortable. 
I'm so used to the traditional Roman Catholic setting where they sing classic songs and there is a lot of silence and reflection and we we read from the Bible and pray together. This service started like a Christian rock concert, then there was a lecture on the theme for the next few weeks, then more singing.
I feel like Austin Stone is a personal finance class and Catholicism is Calculus. If you have a really engaging professor you can learn a lot in calc, but if he's boring and you can barely stay awake, let alone understand him, then it becomes impossible to learn. Calculus has a lot of practical applications but again if you slept through your professor's explanation you just don't know them. Personal finance on the other hand is different. Of course a bad professor could make it more difficult but you still remember almost everything you learn because it's stuff that you need. All the practical applications work for you almost 100% of the time. You will always need to know how to manage credit cards and insurance and a mortgage, whereas in calc, you only need to know optimization if you're a box manufacturer and you want to use the least amount of cardboard to make a million 2x3x2 boxes.
Listening to the pastor of Austin Stone discuss Bible verses as they apply to us today was new for me. I'm sure my priests do that too but it can be so hard to pay attention and sometimes it feels like I'm too far removed. The pastor at Austin Stone was very engaging and everything he said made so much sense. He taught a valuable lesson but I'm unsure if I want to attend again. It was vastly different from any service I've ever been to. I appreciated the message but I felt light years away from my comfort zone and when it comes down to it, you have to be comfortable with your faith in order to practice it.
I'm sure Austin Stone is a wonderful spiritual outlet for a lot of people but to be completely honest, it scares me and I get a cult-y vibe. I want to spend my hour a week with Christ in a church, singing "Lord of the Dance" and praying the Nicene Creed.

Sincerely,
Mare